Writing and using your own Affirmations
Hello my friend,
Not long ago I decided to write fresh affirmations for myself, and I’m so glad I did! They are really helping me stay accountable with myself, alongside daily journalling. I’d love to share with you my experience with creating personal affirmations and how you could make your own :)
Before Christmas, I found myself sat opposite Tiara, a queer tarot reader and writer from Chicago. We were sitting on an empty London double decker bus, which had been refurbished and converted into a seating area for a music and event space in Deptford, London.
I had been itching to get a reading for a few weeks, and it seemed providential that I would meet this lovely soul at this unusual venue for a queer market that I was selling at for the weekend. I gifted Tiara a copy of my tarot deck and she gifted me with a powerful and insightful tarot reading.
I had opened up to Tiara about my reasons for seeking a reading. I was at a crossroads in my creative process and career, and struggling to set a new structure for myself after a crazy year that resulted in emotional block and burnout. The messages from her cards were very comforting and gave practical advice for prioritising time out and trusting the process.
It struck me how she was highlighting truths that I had already known deep down - but had been dismissing and mistrusting due to fear. Tiara could tell I was struggling to manifest, and asked me if I had tried affirmations…
Truth is, I hadn’t. Even though I was well aware of the practice and knew it would by helpful. I guess I found the idea of saying verbal affirmations to myself daunting! It was clear that my discomfort around self-affirming words was a sure sign that I truly did need to begin.
What are affirmations?
Affirmations are encouraging words, mantras and truths used to empower yourself and counteract personal fears, anxieties and insecurities. I first really became aware of the power of affirmations when learning about Louise Hay, the founder of Hay House, who publish my Transient Light Tarot.
“Every thought we think is creating our future.”
Louise Hay
Louise was one of the pioneers for the practice of using affirmations to heal and develop oneself, and manifesting our will into the material world. She was one of the earliest promoters of the link between mind and body with her book “Heal your body” in 1976.
We all know what it’s like to have the voice of an inner saboteur telling us we’re not enough. Or perhaps we have experienced almost crippling imposter syndrome at some point in our professional career. Our mind is a double edged sword. We see this symbolically in the Moon tarot card, represented by the two dogs. One is the tame inner voice, the other is the wild. We know what we want and what we are capable of. Yet we are also prone to doubt ourselves constantly. The power of affirmations is to give more power to the tame mind, to drown out the wild and doubting inner voice. This doubting inner voice is a reflection of our bad experiences, the negative feedback of others or the fear of failure. This voice has its purpose in warning us and keeping us ‘safe’ by reminding us of our fragility or perceived past failures.
This voice is fear. Fear is necessary for our balance when making decisions and for keeping us safe. But fear, when not checked becomes a terribly limiting mind trap - holding us back from even dreaming for better sometimes.
By writing and reciting affirmations to ourselves, especially in the critical moment of fear, is a way of counteracting that fear and recalling the confidence and strength we know we are capable of. Not only does its remind us of the good traits we already have, but it also helps us strengthen and develop new skills and traits through faith and focus.
For me, affirmations are something I have done informally and subconsciously throughout my most difficult times. In those darkest or scariest moments, I have lifted myself through by having a little pep talk with myself. But I’ve started to realise this practice doesn’t have to only be prompted unreliably in high-stake situations. By making it a daily practice of focus and positive reinforcement, we can really build a stronger foundation of faith and courage in ourselves - to avoid those breaking points.
How to write personal affirmations
There’s no set way to write them! But here’s the system I used:
Step 1: Identify
List your most common fears and insecurities.
This can be done by consciously taking note throughout a week when you feel these feelings and writing them down. Keeping a simple daily journal helped me do this. Journalling doesn’t need to be a big commitment - just 1-2 lines a day is enough to help you keep track of patterns in your thoughts and behaviours.
I also pulled a few tarot cards to help me contemplate each area of my life, such as work, friendships and my creativity.
Step 2: Flip the script!
Write down an affirming truth that counteracts each fear. At this point, I found that identifying the opposing truths helped group the fears that come from the same or similar roots - thus condensing the affirmations into a shorter list.
Step 3: Simplify
One by one, re-word each affirmation to be short and memorable.
You can be playful with it. Write the affirmation in a way that will help you remember it. Perhaps you could make it rhyme or you could use metaphors, if you are more of a visual person. Perhaps consider using words that feel comforting or empowering.
Step 4: Speak, recall and meditate
Bring your affirmations to life!
I chose to do this by writing each affirmation on separate colourful cards. I had about 16, but you may have more or less. I then placed this deck by my bed, as I know that before bed I am prone to overthink and the affirmations would be useful last thing at night and first thing in the morning. So find a way of bringing your affirmations into your lifestyle.
Perhaps having them handy on your laptop desktop so you can open them up while you are working, or by the door to read a card before leaving the house. Sometimes, a quick read of the cards does the trick - but if you can, make time to also read them out loud to yourself. This can really help the words sink in and return to your lips later in the day when you most need it
Example Affirmations
As an example, below are some of the affirmations I wrote for myself:
“Each breath I take is precious. Being alive is enough!”
“My heart is open to love, I can love again!”
“I don’t have to prove myself, I always have purpose.”
“I have a gift worth sharing.”
“My body is incredible, it deserves rest!”
“It is okay if I don’t know all the answers, I will learn what I need.”
“I am not afraid of what life has in store for me next.”
“I can give to myself as much as I give others.”
“When I experience loneliness, it helps me connect with others better.”
Thank you for reading, I hope it’s useful and that you give them a go!
Much warmth,
Ari
